Conversation Starters

Some people say that the hardest part about bartending is having to have conversations with random people. I myself sometimes have problems talking to people I do not know. But to be a successful bartender you must be every customers best friend. So making sure that you are always flashing you award winning smile is a must. Also letting them know your name is a huge help for those demanding customers.

Below are some Conversation tips that might help get the ball rolling a bit.

1. Comment on a topic common to both of you at the moment: the food, the room, the occasion, the weather. “Have you ever been to this bar?” “What brings you here?” But keep it on the positive side! Unless you can be hilariously funny, the first time you come in contact with a person isn’t a good time to complain.

2. Comment on a topic of general interest. Sometimes you can scan Google News right before you go on your shift so you can make small talk, so you can say, “Did you hear that Justice Souter is stepping down from the bench?” or whatever might be happening.

3. Ask open questions that can’t be answered with a single word. “What’s keeping you busy these days?” This is a good question if you’re talking to a person who doesn’t have an office job. It’s also helpful because it allows people to choose their focus (work, volunteer, family, hobby) — preferable to the inevitable question (well, inevitable at least in New York City): “What do you do?”
A variant: “What are you working on these days?” This is a useful dodge if you ought to know what the person does for a living, but can’t remember.

4. If you do ask a question that can be answered in a single word, instead of just supplying your own information in response, ask a follow-up question. For example, if you ask, “Where are you from?” an interesting follow-up question might be, “What would your life be like if you still lived there?” If you ask, “Do you have children?” you might ask, “How are you a different kind of parent from your own parents?” or “Have you decided to do anything very differently from the way you were raised?”

5. Ask getting-to-know-you questions. “What newspapers and magazines do you subscribe to? What internet sites do you visit regularly?” These questions often reveal a hidden passion, which can make for great conversation.

6. React to what a person says in the spirit in which that that comment was offered. If he makes a joke, even if it’s not very funny, try to laugh. If she offers some surprising information (“Did you know that one out of every seven books sold last year was written by Stephanie Meyer?”), react with surprise. Recently, I’ve had a few conversations where the person I was talking to just never reacted to what I said. I was trying to be all insightful and interesting, and these two people reacted as though everything I said was completely obvious and dull. It was unsatisfying.

So what can you do when the conversation is such a struggle?

7. A friend argues that you should admit it! “We’re really working hard, aren’t we?” or “It’s frustrating—I’m sure we have interests in common, but we’re having a difficult time finding them.” Clearly this is a desperate measure, but my friend insists that it works. I’ve never had the gumption to try it, I have to admit.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

After looking over some of these tips, it's important to realize that you may in deed need to have some awkward conversations as well. After checking out my terminology page it's important to also hear some of the common phrases bartenders need to say in oder to get things done. For instance, how to ask for money from a customer who is not paying attention to you. Or telling a person they have had too much to drink.

Below are just some of the few phrases I have found worked for me

Approaching a customer

Domestic or Imports

Top shelp or well drinks

Too much to Drink

Suggesting some water

How to ask for money